Sometimes You Gotta Hit a WALL

Sometimes You Gotta Hit The Wall

Hey. It’s me. Steph? The Southern Lady Mama? Remember me?

Whew. Good. Sorry it has been a while. I had to peel myself off of the wall that I hit last week 😉

Last week was cra-zy. Some good crazy. Some bad crazy.

I am fortunate enough to spend a good bit of my free time volunteering at my kids’ school. Last week was Book Fair, and I am Scholastic MONSTER Book Fair at LESon the committee that runs the show. It is incredibly fun and extremely rewarding. We sold almost $30,000 in books in five days. That’s HUGE! It was fun to be part of, but at the end of the day, I looked forward to my heating pad and a glass (or 2) of Chardonnay. In the midst of that, we had a health scare with both my uncle and my dad. Needless to say, there were some sleepless nights, tears shed, and numerous prayers said.

When we finally closed down the book fair on Friday afternoon, I had another big event on my calendar. 20 Brownies camping at my house the next day. And I hadn’t cleaned a lick all week. And Eric, my husband, was leaving to go out of town for a much needed guys weekend. And I have never started a fire by myself. And I have never pitched a tent. And I had a solid foot of leaves on my back deck. And I really wanted to shove the 4 pages of directions that Eric left for the tent and leaf blower up his nose. Can you feel my anxiety level rising?

Saturday morning I pulled out the tent and the 4 pages of directions (complete with diagrams) and tried to tackle pitching my first tent in all my 38 years. Ella “helped” me by swinging on the tree branch and running and catching pages when the wind caught them. At one point when the $%## pole went the wrong way for the 10th time, she said, “It’s no use. We can’t do it without Daddy’s help.” That made me even more determined to get it up. I made her help me more and after another painful 20 minutes, we got the tent up. I asked her what she learned and she answered, “That you can say the ‘s’ word and I can get away with saying ‘crap’ when we are pitching a tent!” #Truth However, I was thinking more along the lines of us putting our minds to something, perseverance, determination. But no, she gets the free pass on a foul mouth.

Ella and I tentWhat she did get from her Brownie campout was a great lesson about friendship. They played games. They just ran around and were silly. They told stories around the campfire that I started!!!! (Where’s my badge!!??) They wrote poems for each other. They had a dance party. The moms even Whip Whip Ney Neyed for the girls. (To which Ella quickly told me, “I would rather not see that again.”) They made smores and drank hot chocolate. They made memories that would last a lifetime.

The ultimate compliment was when one of the Brownies asked if she could come camp out at our house again next week J

So while I look at the last week where I literally ran myself ragged, I am just so thankful that I can. I am thankful for my uncle and dad’s health, which I was reminded this week, can turn on a dime. We cannot take it for granted for one second. I am thankful that Eric is supportive of me “working” full time and not earning a cent. I am thankful that I can use some of my talents at my kids’ school. I am thankful that I didn’t miss a second of the excitement of the book fair. It won’t be long before kids will be ashamed to be so openly excited about books. I am thankful for a home that my daughter’s friends want to come back to again and again. I am thankful that my daughter is making friends and memories that will last a lifetime and that she wants me to be a part of it. I am thankful that I am making new friends through the other mamas because this Mama thing is tough and we need each other,

And I was very thankful for my fuzzy blanket, comfy chair and Kindle coma day that I had on Sunday (and maybe part of Monday) to recuperate.

VOL FOR LIFE Lessons

Love. Math Skills. Patience. And UT Football. These are the things my husband, Eric, brings to the parenting table. I admit when I started dating Eric at the University of Tennessee, I wasn’t a huge football fan. I went to the games, but I really only cared about if we won because that would dictate how fun the parties would be that night. Fortunately, we had a full nine months of dating before the season started so that he could bring me around.

Little did I know that his (and now my) love of UT Football would be a cornucopia of life lessons for our children. 

Vol For Life LessonsHere are 7 Vol For Life lessons for my kids:

  1. Tradition is important. UT Football isn’t just a game. It is a TRADITION. I married into a family that is steeped in this tradition. If it is a Saturday and the Vols are playing, you are there cheering until you are hoarse the next day. We planned our wedding around the school calendar for the teachers, the harvest for the farmers, and the UT football schedule for the inlaws. Our Saturdays in the fall are reserved for the Orange, White, and Family. Watching and cheering on the Vols has given an opportunity for our oldest son, Ethan, to have a special bond with not only his Daddy but his Papa too. He loves to watch the game and ask a million questions so that he knows the ins and outs of how the game is played. UT football is a tradition for our whole family that will last a lifetime. Whether we win or lose, we don’t lose our tradition.
  2. My All.  We give our all for Tennessee. We don’t just roll into the parking lot right before the game. No. We warm up with a big tailgate. Make a mad dash to Peyton Manning Pass for the Vol Walk. Watching Ethan’s excitement as he brushes fingers with Coach Jones and all the players he idolizes on the field makes the huge crowd worth it. We tear up as we sing the alma mater, nearly come out of our skin with excitement as we watch the Pride of the Southland Band form the Power T, cheer wildly when we see the team storm through the T, sing Rocky Top at the top of our lungs, devour Touchdown Dogs, and third down for what like no one’s business. And we don’t just do this for the “big” games. Every. Dang. Game. And that is what you gotta do in life. You can do it halfway just to get through or give it your all and really live.
  3. Teachable Moments. Sometimes when you are giving it your all, you encounter people who take a whole different meaning to that saying. The week before the first game this season I had been talking to the kids about alcohol. I was trying to explain to them that when you had too much, it would cause you to make bad choices. When we were tailgating at Nissan Stadium, Ethan and I witness a man who was stumbling around and singing “Rocky Top” at the top of his lungs up and down the parking lot. At 10 a.m. I looked at Ethan and said, “Son, you remember when I said too much alcohol can cause you to make bad choices?” He answered, “Yea. You mean you can act a fool.” Bingo. Bless that man. I am sure he thought he was giving his all for Tennessee, but I am fairly certain he wasn’t standing by the time the game started four hours later. All kinds of lessons of what to do and not to do at games.
  4. Celebrate the wins. I was spoiled when I was a student at The University of Tennessee in the late 90s. We were on a great winning streak. We expected to win. We haven’t had a season like that in Ethan’s lifetime. Ethan was the only one in the family that could make the Georgia game because of other commitments we couldn’t get out of. It’s ok. He didn’t need us. He just met his Papa at a Truck Stop off the interstate and rolled on to Rocky Top without us. I was so glad he was there to experience that win. I had tears rolling down my face when I saw the players sitting on the wall in the end zone with the fans. They deserved that win and were basking in its glory. When I finally talked to Ethan a few hours later, I could still hear the excitement in his voice. It is important to take the time to celebrate the good times.
  5. Don’t let Defeat defeat you. Ah, there is always that other side of the coin. And unfortunately, we have had more experience with this side than we would like. That is the way life is though. Sometimes we work our butts off, think everything is going to go our way, and fail. And it sucks. And sometimes it isn’t fair. It is a really hard concept for a 9-year old boy (or even a 37-year old man). We can get mad when things don’t go our way. Sulk. Hang our head in defeat. Get ready to just throw all our plans out the window. And sometimes you do have to get your mad out. Last week after the loss to Bama, Ethan was heartbroken and spittin’ mad. We gave him some alone time. When that wasn’t enough, we had him run some laps around the house. Then my husband gave him a stick and told him to go hit a tree. (Laisseze Faire parenting at its finest 😉 After all that is said and done, we have to dust ourselves off, learn from our mistakes, and prepare for next week. But back to #1. Tradition. You don’t turn your back on your team.
  6. No one is perfect. There are eleven players…people…humans that are on the field. Not a one of them are perfect, but we expect them to never make a mistake. Every kick that is missed…reception that is dropped…ball that is fumbled. No one wants that play to be executed perfectly more than that player. And that player? I will blink and Ethan will be the same age as him. They are still kids growing into men with the pressure that I could not even begin to understand. They are going to make mistakes because they are human. The key will be for them to learn from the mistakes and practice to improve just like in real life. And we have to learn to not be so hard on others.
  7. It’s all about CHARACTER. Ethan has no less than six Peyton Manning jerseys (UT, Colts & Broncos, of course). Sure he is an amazing athlete, but he is an even more phenomenal man of character. I am proud to see Ethan wear his number on his chest. I gladly plastered a Fathead of Peyton on his bedroom walls. I am thankful for players like Joshua Dobbs who works his tail off on the field and in the classroom. Oh how he wishes he could have a Dobbs jersey!! Darn NCAA rules!! 😉

So now we are faced with a real grown up sized problem. The next game is Saturday night…in Lexington…on Halloween. It was a time of serious contemplation in our house. Travel 3.5 hours to Lexington to cheer on the Vols? Or Trick or Treat.

Dun Dun Dun!!!!!

Agony. Tears. Then…free candy won out. That is the great thing about tradition, we have a lifetime to cheer on the VOLS. But I am on borrowed time of having kids who still want to be kids.

And Ethan is dressing up as his other fav – Jalen Hurd.

Growing a #VFL